Lately, I have had some quite scary medical happenings that are taking me down a road I didn’t expect and am afraid to walk. But today, my being afraid led to a wonderful memory of a man I once knew named, Charlie, reminding me that, “Those who look to God for help will be radiant with joy…”. Here is the story.
The last thing Charlie ever gave to me was a smile
He sat beside his beloved wife, Norma, in the chapel at the assisted living home where I worked. I had just finished singing “Amazing Grace” at his request and as I was leaving, he took my hand tightly in his, looked up at me with tear-stained eyes, and smiled his Charlie smile.
I didn’t know that Sunday would be the last time I ever saw him. But I think Charlie knew.
A few days earlier, he had come into the assisted living home where I worded to make the bulletins for the Sunday chapel service just like he did every week. But on this particular day, he walked over to the front dest where I was seated, put down the bulletins and stood quietly for a moment looking at them. Nothing about him looked different. He was in this late 80’s or early 90’s, and he had been sick for quite a while, but his walk was still the same gentle Charlie walk, and his voice was still the same soothing, compassionate Charlie voice, but on this day, his eyes were red and glistening with leftover tears.
“Kristen,” he said, “this morning I was given the news that I have only about three more weeks to live. I would really like to hear you sing ‘Amazing Grace’ one more time. Would you sing it for special music at this Sunday’s chapel service?”
So that Sunday, I brought my guitar, and I sang for Charlie.
Years and years have passed since then, and I still think of him whenever fear of the unknown future rises up in me – the kind of fear that can render me useless, that tempts me to pull away from the people I love most. Charlie faced the end of his life with only weeks left, and he did not pull away. He loved fully. He stayed kind, compassionate, and gentle. He was faithful to the work and the life God called him to, right up to his final moment.
Remembering how Charlie lived brings out the immense Truth of the words of Psalm 34:4-5 and gives me the hope that these words are also God’s promise to me. “I prayed to the Lord, and he answered me, freeing me from all my fears. Those who look to him for help with be radiant with joy; no shadow of shame will darken their faces.” – Psalm 34:4-5
Thank you, Charlie, for teaching me – just by the way you lived – that God is enough. He was enough for you, and your life gives me hope and confidence that He will, also, be enough for me. And one day, when I come Home, I can’t wait to sing “Amazing Grace” with you again.
Thank you, Jesus.
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